


Walking in the Wind

by lukeyandlou



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012)
Genre: Angst, Cancer, Death Fic, F/M, Sad, TMNT 2012, Walking in the wind, renetangelo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-05
Updated: 2017-08-05
Packaged: 2018-12-11 15:20:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11717082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lukeyandlou/pseuds/lukeyandlou
Summary: "Everything we do is make believe, because everything is so much better that way. The reality is that I have cancer, and I don't know much longer I have. Reality also is that you're my best friend and I love you, and I'll always be right here. Don't forget that," Renet told him. She can't die, because they have too many adventures they need to go on first.





	Walking in the Wind

**Author's Note:**

> I originally posted this one-shot in May of 2016, but I decided to remaster and re-post. Since I recently released a death fic one-shot and it got a lot of love, I thought a repost of this beauty would be appropriate.   
> Thank you all for the support!  
> Music: Walking in the Wind – One Direction  
>  Terrible Things – Mayday Parade   
>  Cancer – My Chemical Romance

Hey, Mikey, wait up!” she cried out, her voice strained by a loss of breath and a string of giggles, struggling to chase the smaller boy who was _much_ more in shape than she was.

“The Mikey-nator will never surrender to you, evil queen! Do not fear, for I must free you of this horrendous confliction! I must restore you to the most butt-kicking-est and beautifulest queen of all time!” he shouts back, waving the blanket that was tied along his neck as a cape and continue to run through the sewer tunnels.

A small smile came across her face, revealing the little gap in her teeth that he loved so much as she caught onto the old game. “What do you speak of, pathetic hero?! I shall never bow down to you!” she says, and he can’t help but laugh at how cute it sounds when she tries to be scary.

The best friends continue to chase each other through the tunnels, making an assortment of battle sound effects and over dramatic reactions. For a second, Renet would get distracted, too mesmerized in how big and blue his eyes were to remember about anything else. Sure, it may seem sappy and quite too affectionate over just a dear friend, but Michelangelo meant so much more to her.

The best part of it all was that without her skill as a time apprentice, she would have never even known him. For a year after she had met him he was her only escape, the only way that she could pretend she didn’t have to face the reality that she did. The only way that she could handle the constant bullying at school and the overbearing amounts of stress was remembering that she could always come over and be comforted by his hugs and warm hearted attempts at cheering her up.

It didn’t take long for her father to realize it, too. He saw how many nights she came home from school in tears, how many times she refused to get out of bed in the mornings, how many times she had told him that Michelangelo was the only person in existence to ever understand. He saw the way she held herself up when it was almost time to go visit him, and the way her brown eyes brightened when she would return home after a visit. He knew how much the boy meant to her and that he was the only possible way he could keep his little girl happy.

Knowing that he would sacrifice anything to do what was best for his daughter, he had agreed to the two of them making a drastic move. It was quite the adjustment moving to a different time period, and it was actually quite unorthodox, but as long as they stayed near the underground there was no harm that could possibly be done; right?

The move was the best thing that ever happened to Renet, and even if he never said it out loud, it was the best thing that ever happened to Mikey too.

For the entirety of his life, he had felt so incredibly lonely, even growing up with three brothers, He was the baby brother, only a pest for them, and not often did he receive someone to play with him. Even being so close in age, his brothers were so much more grown up. Never in his life would he imagine that he could ever meet someone like Renet – someone who thought just like him. Someone who loved his games and his cartoons and his trading card collection just as much as he did, and was always there for non-stop adventures and fun.

Not to mention the butterflies he felt in his tummy every time that he made her laugh.

A smirk grew across his face as they reached his favorite part of the game, the entire plotline stuck exactly to his memory. Purposely slowing his pace, he waits for her to emerge closer to him and sees by the shine in her eyes that she remembers too.

“I will devour your soul, damned Mikey-nator!” she shouts, her fingers catching his shoulders and turning him around. As soon as he turns, his large hands cup her rosy cheeks and their eyes inlock.

“Fear not, my fair queen! I will liberate you from this menacing mind control!” he says, and then leans in to kiss both of her cheeks.

Renet pretends to drop dramatically to the floor, hoping her falling gasp would outdo the one from last time. Mikey is swift to catch her, swinging him under her, pushing her golden bangs from her eyes.

“Queen Renet? Please, tell me that blow was not too powerful for you! Oh, my lady, there is no way I could _possibly_ survive without you! Please, return to me!” he cries out, sliding to his knees and resting his hand over his eyes, cracking his fingers open just a bit.

Renet pretend to cough and then opens her eyes, pulling his hand away from his face. “There is no blow too powerful for a queen such as myself, my daring hero!”

He falls into a fit of giggles, thanking God for creating a girl who would still enjoy imagination at the age of 16.

The vibration of his phone ruins the mood, but he knows better than to ignore a text when he is allowed out.

_“Start heading home, it’s getting late” -Raph_

Mikey sighs, slipping the phone back into his belt. “Raphie says I got to go home now. You wanna sleep over tonight?”

“Sure,” she says. Sleep overs were common between the two of them and knowing how innocent minded the two of them were it was never a problem. “I’ll race you home!”

The two teens release arms and begin racing off, a routine that they did every time they had to return home. Only this time, Renet had a hard time ignoring the strange intense burning in her lungs.

X

“We’re home!” Mikey calls out as he enters his home, Renet following a few steps behind him.

“Good evening, my son. Have the two of you had fun on your adventures today?” Splinter smiles warmly at the two youngsters from where he drinks tea in the kitchen.

“The funnest!” Mikey shouts back opening the fridge and grabbing out two slices of left over pizza for the microwave.

“’Funnest’ is not a word, Mikey,” Donnie has to comment, from where he sits on his laptop on the couch.

“Psh, nerd,” Mikey says to Renet, causing them both to giggle.

Donnie rolls his eyes. “I wouldn’t keep up the sass if I were you, Michelangelo. April and Casey were over here earlier for some treats, and you guys missed all of the fun. Being the kind brother that I am, I decided to save you a few leftovers. Perhaps, I’ll just save them for myself on another day,” Donnie says, putting in his earbuds with a mocking smirk.

Mikey rushes over and yanks out the earbuds, pulling Donnie up. “I’m sorry D, you’re the bestest brother ever and I love you! What leftovers?”

“That’s what I thought,” Donnie smiles, walking to the kitchen and pulling out the ingredients for s’mores.

“Mhm. S’mores are the bestest for the bestest of sleepovers,” Renet says, chocolate staining all over her chin.

“Kitty wants some s’mores too!” Mikey says, going towards the freezer to retrieve his pet.

“Do you think that if I feed her, she’ll like me a little more?” Renet asks nervously, recalling her previous interactions with Ice Cream Kitty.

“Who in the world wouldn’t like you? You’re the raddest girl ever in the history of girls, and Ice Cream Kitty knows that too. She just…has a hard time adjusting to new things,” he says, the cat meowing chipperly in greeting of her boy.

“Aww, I missed you too kitty!” he smiles, returning affection. Renet watches the two fondly, her heart swelling at how loving and gentle he is.

When the bowl slides on the table between him, the animal’s happiness decreases when she notices the girl. A small frown forms on her face as she begins to hiss, dropping the smile off of Renet’s face.

“Ice Cream Kitty! Now, is that any way to treat the queen of the universe? I will not stand for this!” he says, trying his best to put on a stern face.

The cat cowers into herself in shame, always tainted by the disappointment of her Mikey. She just wanted him for herself, was that too hard to ask for?

“I’m sorry Renet, she must be not in a good mood. Wanna go in the room and have a pillow battle?” he offers.

“Sure,” she smiles, her smaller hand enclosed in his as the two head off to his room.

Splinter puts down his newspaper and lays a finger on the cat’s head in comfort as Raph enters the room. “Well, seems that Ice Cream Kitty is feeling a bit of jealousy.”

“You and me both, cat,” Raph adds, wishing that he would’ve hung out with his brother just a little more all those years.

X

Pillow fights were almost considered a cliché, for how often they occurred, but to the two chipper teens it could never possibly get old. Something rough happening with such soft, fluffy objects? Unbeatable.

However, this time around, Mikey couldn’t help but notice that Renet wasn’t enjoying the game as much as she usually did. Her laughter seemed forced, her hits were weak, and her eyes were dulling. He didn’t know why, but he did know that he didn’t like it at all.

“Renet?” he asks, tilting his head to the side, his eyes enlarging in concern.

“Yeah, Mikey?” she asks, trying to look as happy as she possibly could.

“Is there something wrong? You look kinda down,” he says, lowering his pillow and giving a pouty frown.

Renet sighed. “I’m sorry, Mikey. I’m not trying to be a downer, I just – I’m not feeling too good.”

Mikey frowns, wrapping his arms around Renet’s shoulders and cuddling his best friend into him. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m feeling kinda wrong, and I don’t even know exactly what it is. I just…know something isn’t right. And besides that, my chest is hurting really bad, like there’s bombs inside my lungs and they’re working on burning up all of my insides. It’s kinda like some big dragon is battling me but it’s invisible so I don’t know where to fight it back,” she sighs.

Mikey frowns in understanding, snuggling his face into her shoulder in comfort. He hated for her to hurt, and it made him tremble in his gut.

“You’re my bestest friend in the whole entire world, you know that Renet?”

“I know that, Michelangelo. You’re mine too. You’re my favorite wonderful thing.”

Mikey smiles and nuzzles her as they crawl into the blanket, feeling the exhaustion from the day’s physical activity catching up with them.

Mikey knew that nothing would ever go wrong again.

X

It was 2:52 A.M. when things started to go wrong.

She was rudely awakened by her heavy fits of coughing, coughs that sounded too rough and ragged to come out of her delicate body. As soon as she caught consciousness, the raging pain from her chest caught up to her, much more intense than it had been before. It was so excruciating that she couldn’t even find it in her to speak. The tears began to stream down her face and the strangled sobs were melded with the nasty coughs, each one increasing her pain.

Mikey shoots up in front of her as soon as he is awakened, horrified at the sight in front of him. When he rested his fingers lightly along her forehead, he nearly flinched backwards at how hot her forehead was.

“Renet! Wait here, I’ll go get you help! Are you safe to wait here by yourself?” he asks, holding both of her cheeks so that she is looking at him, feeling his heart crumble apart at the pain in her eyes. Suddenly, two trails of blood begin flowing out of her mouth, more and more coming out with the coughing.

Mikey begins to tremble in horror. “MASTER SPLINTER! DAD! HELP!” he cries, holding her close to him and giving weak attempts to stop her blood and tears, his own tears starting to fall.

“Michelangelo?” Splinter is quick to burst into the room with his three other sons not far behind him. He gasps in horror when he sees the sick girl, who is now having breathing contradictions, and a sobbing panicked Michelangelo holding on to her.

“I don’t know what happened, we were just sleeping and then we woke up to this!” Mikey cries out.

“Leonardo, call Renet’s Father, Donatello, call the ambulance, and Raphael, take Michelangelo. Go!” Splinter commands, each of his sons fast to act. Splinter swiftly sweeps the girl out of Michelangelo’s grasp and into his arms, which seems to somehow increase the distress of both teens.

“No! I need to be with her, dad! Don’t take her away!” Mikey cries, kicking and struggling when Raph picks him up and turns him around.

“Shh…it’s okay, Mikey. They’re gonna take your friend to the hospital so that she could get treated and they could make her all better. You’ve just gotta be patient, okay buddy?” Raph says soothingly.

“I have to go! I’ve gotta stay with her! She’s scared of people; they don’t understand her! She can’t go without me!” Mikey cries out, and Raph feels his heart dropping a bit. It isn’t fair – none of this fucked up world is. It isn’t fair that Mikey can’t go because of the way he looks when he could have if he were any other person.

“I’m sorry, Mikey, I’m really sorry. She’ll be okay and you could see her right after, alright?” Raph sighs, watching as Splinter struggles to keep the young girl awake.

“Just let him go with her for right now, Sensei,” Raph says, releases his little brother and watching as he runs to the girl and wraps his arms around her, not caring about getting blood and vomit and tears on him.

Everything is a blur before her dad was running in, sweeping his child up and running with her out of the sewers without hardly a few words. Mikey holds his knees to his chest and cries more in confusion, Splinter taking him into his arms and humming to him in comfort. The entire family tries their best to console their baby, because that was all they could really do about it.

X

It had been _three_ days since that had happened and Michelangelo hadn’t heard anything from Renet. Michelangelo had never been so still or so silent.

He had remained tucked into his blanket in sadness, checking his phone over and over to see if she was willing to talk to him. Had he done something wrong? Did she not want to talk to him anymore? What if she had died that night?

_No. She couldn’t have._

He almost fell out of the bed when his phone finally vibrated.

_“Mikey…I’m coming over. We have to have a talk.” -Renet_

Ignoring the strange solemnness of the text, a smile lights across Mikey’s face.

“ _Okayy!!_ ”

Immediately wiping the depression from his face, he tries to get himself back into his normal state of mind.

_She’s okay – she’s okay – she’s okay – she’s okay!_

Blasting the happiest song he knows through his earbuds, he lays down on his bed with a smile on his face and prepares for her visit.

As soon as he senses the door open, he jumps above the bed, the slightest bit of brightness leaving his face when he sees her.

It is her, but it doesn’t look like his Renet at all. Her typically peachy skin is hauntingly pale and her golden hair is turning dull, along with the slowness in the way her body moved and the pain in her eyes. This was his Renet, the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, but it seemed as if he was looking into the face of death itself.

“Hi, Mikey,” she says, her voice quiet and soft.

“My queen…what happened?” he asks, dropping his phone and running over to hug her tightly. She feels frail and delicate, and it takes her a second to hug back. She opens her mouth in attempt to form the words, but nothing but air seeps through, until tears streaming down her face.

“Aw Renet…I promise I’m not mad at you. C’mere, you can tell me what’s wrong,” he says, leading her to sit on the edge of the bed.

The two of them are silent for a moment, Michelangelo waiting for her to be able to speak and Renet staring at the wall, conjuring her head for how she could possibly be able to put this.

“Mikey…there is something very wrong with me,” she says, looking down in sadness.

“No there isn’t! I promise you that are completely perf- “

“I’m sick, Michelangelo,” she cuts him off, trying to get to the basic point.

“Sick? Well, that’s okay! After someone is sick then they always get better and- “

“I have cancer.”

Michelangelo freezes mid-sentence, suddenly forgetting how to function, allowing the words to process through his brain.

“What?”

“I have cancer. In my lungs, it was hereditary. The thing that killed my mom. They caught it really late…” she starts to say, the tears increasing. Mikey grabs ahold of her hand and holds it tight in encouragement.

“I’m not going to make it,” she finally says.

Both of them are silent for a few more minutes, still tightly holding hands and staring blankly at the wall in front of them. It was like gravity had fallen down upon them, dragging them down into the depths of the darkest and coldest parts of the universe.

“You are going to make it,” Mikey finally corrects her, silent tears on his cheeks.

“No, Mikey, the doctor said- “

“I don’t give a damn what the doctor said. Since when did we start listening to people and all the hidden super villains, the ones trying to bring us down? You can’t let the brain worms get to you, Renet! There is _no_ blow too powerful for a queen such as yourself!” he encourages, grabbing both of her light hands and looking her in the eyes.

Renet can’t help but smile through her tears and wrap her arms tightly around him, both of them giggling and crying at the same time, holding on like they would be sunken away if they ever let go.

He got up and walked over to the drawers, making her sink at the loss of warm contact.

“What are you doing?” she asks, seeing him take out a notepad and a pen.

“We are going to start planning things out,” he says, laying on his stomach with legs crossed and she joining him in the same position.

“Planning what, exactly?” she asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Of all the adventures we are going to go on. You can’t die if we have a whole lot of adventures planned that you have to go on,” he says, and she smiles for the first time in a while.

“Oh really, Mikey-nator? What kind of adventures do you have in mind?” she asks, a smirk across her face.

“Well, we definitely have to go have dinner in outer space. That’s a big one,” he says, writing down the first bullet point and proceeding to decorate it with a small sketch of space symbols.

“Definitely. And how about hosting a national pigeon race?” she adds, grabbing a pen for herself from the basket.

“We also gotta host a cooking show in a foreign language,” he adds.

“How about playing soccer on every single island that exists?” she smiles.

“And we have to have a skateboard race down the tallest mountain in the history of the world!”

“Prank every historical figure from every iconic decade that ever existed!”

“Invent a type of pizza for every single flavor that existed in the history of the world!”

“Make an entire kingdom out of Play-Doh!”

“Host a kickball championship using the Kraang as the ball!”

By the time the sheet of paper was completely filled, the two were laughing hysterically, discussing exactly how their plans were going to work.

“See, there’s no way you can die yet! There’s way too much stuff to do first, and way too many adventures to go on!” Mikey says.

She tackles him onto the bed and wraps her arms around his neck, nuzzling her face into his cheek.

“We’re just gonna have to prove those doctors wrong, my daring hero,” she says.

Mikey smiles and closes his eyes, trying to blind the toxic thoughts with those thoughts of plans and pranks and smiles and his beautiful Renet.

“There’s no way you’re going to leave me here,” he says, hardly above a whisper.

X

_Three Months Later_

“C’mon Mike, just open the door already!” she giggles, laying in her bed while Mikey has stayed locked in the closet for nearly forty-five minutes.

“No way, it’s a surprise! I’m just about ready!” he replies, and she rolls her eyes playfully.

Since her diagnosis, Renet had gotten sicker and sicker and showed no signs of improving. It had gotten to the point where she no longer even had the strength to get out of her bed, and even though they couldn’t play the same games anymore Mikey always found a way to improvise. Instead, they started making comics of their story, drawing and writing over and over again. Renet had went through the efforts of chemotherapy, even though it wasn’t going to make very much of a difference in her fate and everyone was aware of that.

The elephant in the room was the worst part – the fact that every single one of them knew that she was going to die, but no one has yet had the guts to say it out loud.

At this point, the bright and eccentric girl that he knows was hardly even recognizable. The beautiful body of golden curly hair that he had been so infatuated with had completely evacuated – leaving her pale and sickly and dull. Her hazelnut brown eyes looked like the bottom of a dark pit and her smile would only crack when forced, as if it hurt her just to simply laugh. It broke his heart – seeing the way that she was slowly fading away, slowly being taken by the gusts of the wind.

Even yet, when she was dying and crippling away, she was so incredibly beautiful.

Even if he wasn’t the most _talented_ in the world at it, Michelangelo loved to create art. He loved making drawings and putting paint on his fingers and crafting castles for them to live in. However, this particular project that he had in mind was much too precious to be trusted at his mediocre skill.

He had always envied his brother Raphael’s artistic abilities, and wished that he had enough patience to teach him. Whenever he had asked his brother before if he could show him a few tricks, he would either tell him to fuck off or point out how useless teaching Mikey was. That was why he didn’t know why he would bother asking his brother if he would help him make a special costume for Renet. Yet sometimes his small minded decisions came in handy because Raphael had immediately uncharacteristically agreed. Maybe it was because he had nothing better to do. Maybe Master Splinter said he had to start being nicer. Maybe he was doing it because he knows she’s dying.

It was even stranger that Raph let him tell him all about his fictional world while they were making it – how Renet is a beautiful queen and they must fight the forces of evil together. He would only smile, rubbing his thumb against Mikey’s forehead, and Mikey almost asked him if he was going to cry.

Of course, he knew his limitations on how far to run his mouth.

There was only one thing that he had to do all on his own – one thing that he knew he had to do for himself. He had spent every ounce of determinate and focus he could muster to put together one craft – because he would run around the world and back to see her smile one more time.

Finally, he put together the finishing touches, matching it with the beautiful and highly constructed cloak underneath.

“I’m ready!” he shouted out, and she caught herself back from drifting off again.

“Queen Renet, you have shown the most noble of bravery and courage with your success in the deadliest of battles – and you have proven yourself to be the most dashing warrior that exists in all of the galaxies. I present to you the cloak of a hero!” he says, trying to make his voice sound as extravagant as it usually did without any of the shaking. 

As he carried out the costume and presented it to her, he saw her eyes light up for the first time in months.

“Mikey, what is this? How did you…oh my god!” she shouts, as loud as she can with the hoarseness in her voice, hugging the costume close to her chest.

“A hero has his ways with magic, especially to honor a soldier such as yourself. Of course, someone so eccentrically wonderful could not receive any fitting honor with a crown to honor her,” he says, bowing on one knee in front of her bed.

“I know you are sad about losing your hair and you don’t want me to look there anymore…but I have decided that such a request is indefinitely impossible, since looking at you is my favorite of all things to do. I thought that maybe if you had something like this to wear, you wouldn’t feel so bad about it,” he says, providing a weak smile before he reveals the very special craft that he had worked so hard to give her.

It was like a helmet, but decorated with the fanciest of decorations that matched her cloak and truly brought her character to life.

A large smile begins to form on her face, her mouth hanging slightly open as she brought it into her grasp. “Michelangelo…”

“Is it too much? I mean, I would totally understand if you didn’t want to wear it, and it might have been inconsiderate to tell you to wear it in the first place – wait, are you crying? Oh God Renet, I didn’t mean to- “

His nervous paced ranting was cut off as she locked her arms around him, nuzzling her face cozily into the crook of his neck. “I love it. I love it so much.”

He giggles nervously, trying to hold her as tight as he could without feeling that he was going to snap her in half. “I’m glad you think so.”

“Could you help me get up? I want to try it on!” she says, yipping in excitement.

Sometimes, Mikey faced times in his life where he thanks God that he was raised in ninjitsu, and that he was built with a firm pack of muscles. When he pulled her into his arms, feeling lighter than a feather even when she was taller than him, it had been one of those times.

While she was changing, he walked around the room and admired the photographs – posters of bands and movies he had never even heard of and he regretted all the times that he could’ve asked. He takes one of her pillows and hugs it close to his chest, the smell rubbing onto his body being so _Renet._ He never knew anywhere other than the sewers for fifteen years and now this place was as good as home.

“I am ready, Mikey-nator!” she says, her voice daring and confident, everything that she hadn’t been for _such_ a long time. “I have come to defeat the menacing forces of evil and regain control of our very galaxy! Thanks to you, my daring hero, I feel like a queen again!”

Once she appears in the door way, her cape flowing and her crown held up high, he couldn’t help but stare. For a second, he wondered if the entire universe and every star has combined into one human right in front of him.

Snapping himself out of it, he allowed a smirk to grow across his face and for a second he forgot that she was even sick in the first place. “Join me, fair queen! With such devilish beings roaming our magnificent kingdom, there is no time to waste! We must embark on the most wondrous of adventures!”

She is quick to start running, even though it was hard for her to stand up in the first place, and almost instantly after she set herself into motion she collapsed to the floor in a fit of ugly coughing. Mikey suddenly snapped back into reality, rushing over to her and lifting her up to the bed.

“Renet! Are you okay?” he asks, resting his thumb under her chin to hold her head up.

“Yeah, I’m fine…” she begins to say, and the shining happiness that she had just worn seconds ago fades into a crumble and suddenly she’s crying, teardrops falling upon her new outfit.

“Oh Renet…” Mikey says, and when he pulls her into his arms she only cries harder, pushing herself into his chest like she could somehow jump inside and never come back out.

“I hate it Mikey, I can’t stand it! It ruined everything! I’m not even myself anymore, I can’t even _walk_ for Christ’s sake! I’m useless, just a living carcass of blood and bones while everyone just waits on me to die!” she exclaims.

“Hey, don’t talk like that! You can’t be talking so negative or else it will all just get to you! You won’t win like that and I know how brave you are and I know that you can do it! Just remember Renet, there are so many adventures that we still have to- “

“No Mikey, don’t you understand? There _are_ no more adventures for me! I’m gonna die, Mikey, I’m gonna die! There are so many things that I’ll never be able to do – I’m never gonna get older than 16! I’ll never have another birthday, or another Christmas or summer or Halloween, I’ll never graduate from school or get a career or get married or have kids. I’ll never get to do all those things we talked about, or even the stupidest simple things, like going to goddamn prom or something!” she lashes out.

“Who said you can’t do those things? This is your life and you decide how to live it, not some doctor or some stupid disease or the fact that things aren’t the same as they used to be! Just because life’s harder for you than for most kids doesn’t mean that it’s bad! I’m not gonna do those things we talked about either, hell, I can’t even go outside unless it’s the pitch middle of the night! No matter how long I live I’ll never go to school or get a job and I never thought I’d even talk to a girl until my life started getting so strange, because I always thought I’d do nothing but hide in the sewers my whole life. Yet I’m still happy, aren’t I? You ever think about that?” he says.

She sniffles and wipes the rest of the tears off of her cheek, her eyes wandering downward guiltily.

“You wanna do things like prom? Who said you can’t? We could have a prom right now, right here, just you and me! We can turn the lights off and play one of these bands that you have on your walls, whichever one is your favorite!” he says, holding her hand with a wide smile on his face.

“I was supposed to be _pretty_ when I went to prom, with a nice dress and my hair and makeup done. Not looking like a ghostly skeleton who is barely holding themselves away from death,” she sighs.

“Renet Tilley, you are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. When I look at you I see the stars and the moon in your eyes and you being sick has not changed that in the slightest. No amount of fancy stuff or special make ups will ever be needed to make you beautiful when you are already, in my eyes, the epitome of perfection. No matter what happens to you, and no matter what you think about yourself, I think you’re beautiful,” he says, wriggling a bit uncomfortably in confession of his feelings.

The tears remain in her eyes, but in a different way, a sad smile easing on her face and her fingers resting on her heart.

“Now enough of all that sappy serious stuff, am I right?” he says, forcing the water to stay in his eyes and a big smile to crawl on his face instead. Kneeling on one knee again, he says “Queen Renet, will you go to prom with me?”

She giggles slightly, her fingers intertwining tighter with his. “It would be my honor.”

He pulls her up as delicately as possible, holding her body up against him and supporting her so that she could keep her balance without waring herself out. He turned on her radio and switched off the light.

When she looked up at him, his big blue eyes staring at the wall behind him as they gently waltzed back and forward, he looked almost sad. It was unnatural; a sad Mikey was just something that disrupts the rotation of the world itself.

“I’m sorry I acted like that Mikey…I didn’t mean it,” she says softly.

“It’s okay…I understand. You don’t gotta feel happy all the time, y’know,” he says.

“And what you said, it isn’t true. You are gonna go on adventures on day, whether I’m with you or not. Things aren’t always gonna be so hard for you, I promise,” she tells him.

“I guess I’ll just have to grow up and see, won’t I? There’s just one adventure in particular that stands out to me, that I can’t wait to finally see,” he tells her.

“And which adventure would that be?” she asks.

“The day that I’m going to marry you,” he tells her.

Renet presses her cheek against his chest once more, closing her eyes to avoid the tear fall. “I would love that, Michelangelo.”

He rubs her cheek soothingly when her voice cracks, the two of them continuing their slow dance in silence for what felt like endless decades, just enjoying each other’s presence. Who knew how much more time they would have with each other after this.

“Mikey, I need you to understand something. You are my best friend and the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. I will never leave you, and that is a promise. I will be along your side on every adventure that you go on, and one day you will find me again, in new places, for new adventures that we could never even have imagined. You were the light of my life and you taught me what it is to find fun and happiness in even the darkest of times. You are the purest of beings to ever exist and no matter what happens, I will always be with you,” she told him.

“I know Renet,” he says.

“Everything we do is make believe, because everything is so much better that way. The reality is that I have cancer, and I don’t know much longer I have. Reality also is that you’re my best friend and I love you, and I’ll always be right here. Don’t forget that,” Renet told him.

His chin trembled and his lip quivered, his mind storming with thoughts that he didn’t know how to say out loud. Instead, suddenly remembering the occasional positive outcome of his idiotic, thoughtless, rash decisions, he grabbed both of her cheeks and he kissed her.

She was a bit surprised at first, her tired eyes wide open. As soon as he gets nervous and tries to pull away, she wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him back, with passion and love, and she isn’t sure if the feeling on her face is from the sweating of butterflies in her tummy or the tears over the fact that she doesn’t think she’ll ever see him again.

Yet now, it wasn’t time to think about that.

X

When Michelangelo had gotten up that morning, he didn’t understand why the air felt so _heavy_.

Today was supposed to be a beautiful day, a day of opportunity and new things and love and appreciation. Why was everything so dark, and why did he feel something struck deep in his nerves?

He decided to shake it off, even if it made him uneasy to hear the raindrops streaming through the pipes.

An eager smile on his face, he ran to his desk and returned to fixing the finishing touches on his latest art project. Thanks to some help from April, he had gotten some access to a few art supplies so he could make something he had learned online. He only needed a few more things to finish the paper mache bouquet of flowers. Of course, he could’ve just had April buy real flowers, but then they wouldn’t be from him directly and he wouldn’t feel so good about it.

Besides, everything they did was make believe. Everything make believe was better.

As he was gluing to crumpled papers together, there was a burning rush through his head, and he didn’t understand it. Was it a nervous excited, perhaps? Today _was_ going to be a crucially important day.

Today, he was going to ask Renet if she wanted to be his girlfriend.

As the craft continued, he hummed happily to her favorite song and thumped his foot, because even if the day seemed ugly and his mind was tearing down his entire body, there wasn’t a thing in the world that could ruin his day.

Well, maybe there was one thing. But he couldn’t remember that right now.

He jumps when he hears a knock at the door, but smiles away his chills in excitement to show his family was he has created. Before he can open the door, it opens and he sees his father.

“Sensei! Look, April helped get me stuff to make some paper flowers for Renet, do you think she’ll like them? I got them in different shades of blue, all her favorite colors and – Sensei?” he said, suddenly quirking his head in confusion.

His father is there, but it is almost like he isn’t, only a hollow wood that ghosts from the hallway, staring at his little boy with the most haunting eyes he has ever worn. He begins to slowly enter the world with complete disregard to his son’s words, his eyes wet with tears. The sight alone is enough to shake Mikey to the bone, scooting back slightly in fear.

It is agonizingly slow as he walks to the bed, sitting down and allowing himself to seep down into the mattress, his ears drooping down. “Michelangelo, come here.”

Mikey stares at his feet and quirks one of them back and forward to comfort himself, hesitantly walking over. As soon as he is in arms reach, his father picks him up and holds him close to him close, shuddering in hard breaths.

“Father? What’s wrong? Why are you so sad?” he says, and this only breaks his father’s heart further.

“Michelangelo…” he begins, taking a deep breath and holding the boy closer to him.

“You’re scaring me, Dad. What is it?” Mikey asks, and his father’s hand is rubbing his head.

“Baby, your friend Renet is not with us anymore. She has joined your mother now,” Splinter says, the words physically hurting his throat.

Splinter would never forget the pain of losing Tang Shen. The burn still stood, still hurt him every single day. Imagining one of his children feeling the same pain that he had endured was almost more painful in itself.

Mikey is silent for a few moments, increasing Splinter’s anxiety, his son’s big blue eyes fixed on the wall in front of them. Finally, he speaks, his voice low and hoarse and so deprived of the energy that had just been in it before.

 “W-What?” he says.

“Renet has passed away this morning,” Splinter says, closing his eyes in shame. He never would have imagined that his child would learn the same tragic lesson about the cruelness in life the way that he did.

Mikey is quiet for another few seconds, before he bursts into something unexpected. He’s laughing, and not just the casual giggle either. He’s belly laughing, the laughter that was so pure in his child typically over the simplest things suddenly cutting through the environment, adding to the toxicity.

“That’s funny Sensei, but those pranks don’t work on me! Y’know, Renet and I have a lot of adventures planned and one day we are gonna get married, and that’s why she’s not allowed to die. See, today I’m going to ask her to be my girlfriend!” Mikey says, jumping out of Splinter’s grasp with the bright smile back on his face.

Splinter shuddered, suddenly questioning if he was right to let them into the world a few years ago. “Angel, this is not a prank. I would never joke that way with you.”

“C’mon Sensei, you can’t run a prank after you already been busted. It’s okay, I’m not mad at you,” Mikey says, a cheeky grin on his face.

“Michelangelo- “

“See Sensei, I can prove it to you! I’m gonna go over there right now and give her these flowers, and then I can stay over there and have a sleepover! Renet isn’t dead, she isn’t allowed to! I’ll show you Sensei, I’ll make you understand!” he says, grabbing the paper bouquet of flowers and dashing out of the room.

Splinter is quick to follow after him, but did not exceed at his full speed potential because as painful as it was maybe that would be the only way for his son to understand.

Mikey sprinted faster than he ever had in his whole life, flowing with the wind and not even keeping track of where he was or what exactly he was doing. He didn’t understand why tears were falling down his face, or why he was laughing and sobbing all at the same time. What did this mean?

“Renet!” he began to yell as he approached the house, seeing that the lights were dim and the buzzing of the television was not present.

He didn’t even knock as he burst through the door, his face mixed with sweat and tears and an awful shuddering sounds, his eyes searching quickly around the home. Renet’s father was there, holding himself in a ball and sobbing intensely, a horribly agonizing sound that made Mikey feel that he would never be okay again. He had never seen her father cry.

He chose to look past him and continuing running until he found Renet’s room, slamming open the door and jumping inside. The room was still and grey, all of the colors and life completely vacuumed out, and there was a large bump under the sheets of the bed. Mikey quickly ripped them off, revealing his best friend, who was positioned as still as a rock. He never thought in his entire life that he could ever see her so small and empty, a pale body with her hands placed carefully over her chest. She was wearing the costume that he had made her.

“My fair queen, what has happened to you? Have you been captured and put into stasis by the menacing forces? However will I be able to make that up to you?! Do not fear, your daring hero has come to save you!” he shouts, grabbing her shoulders and feeling that her entire body felt as light as a sliver of paper.

“You gotta wake up Renet, you gotta see what I made you!” he screams directly into her face. “I made you flowers because it’s better than buying flowers since we are so very fond of make believe! You’re so beautiful and you make my tummy wiggly and my hands sweaty because you are so special to me and I want us to be together forever! You could be my girlfriend and it could be just us against the world, can’t it? You wouldn’t ever just leave me here, would you?” he asks, cracks in his voice as he presses the flowers into her hands.

“Goddamnit Renet, wake up! Why are you acting so dead and stuff, this whole prank everybody’s pulling is really getting old! I know it’s a prank, because I know you’re not really dead. You _never_ break your promises. What about all the adventures we planned? What about all the places we need to see and pranks we need to pull and pizza we need to try and bad guys we gotta defeat?      What about getting married? You _promised_ me, Renet,” he says, his voice turning a bitter cold.

“You _fucking promised!_ You said you were never gonna leave me, that you were always gonna be here! You knew that you weren’t supposed to die! Why would you do that to me? Did you even care at all, or was that all a prank as well? You said you would _always_ be with me!” he screams at the top of his lungs.

Just in that moment, Splinter races inside the room, picking up his child which only upsets him even further. Mikey is now kicking and thrashing and screaming things out, whether it was to put him down or her name or that she promised she wouldn’t leave.

Splinter lost ahold of his little boy once they reached the sewers, and Mikey began racing in the other direction, thinking that maybe he could run off the edge of the world if he ran far enough.

Finally, his legs gave in and he collapsed, falling to the floor in the heaviest sobs he ever had, trying to sink down into the floor somehow so he could just leave this place and follow her.

Splinter ran and cradled his son once more, this time Mikey letting him comfort him, the two of them crying into each other for the very worst of heartbreaks that both of them had endured.

X

It had been a week.

Mikey hadn’t moved off of his bed in that time, only laying buried under the blankets the same way she was when he had found her. His family had forced him to eat, although not even pizza sounded appetizing.

When she had left the world, the world had left with her.

Another knocking came to the door, and Mikey assumed he was going to be force fed again. He didn’t even have to move to know who it was in the doorway.

“You think she knew how much I loved her, Sensei?” he asks, the first words he’s spoken in a week.

Splinter doesn’t answer only walks closer to the bed and puts a hand on his paling son’s side. “I had a visit with Renet’s father. He had something that I must give to you.”

Mikey reluctantly turns around, his eyes dull and bloodshot and the freckles on his face hardly visible.

“It’s a letter. She had given it to him and told him that she wanted you to read it after she passed.”

Michelangelo continues to stare and if it wasn’t for the moving in his chest he would’ve questioned if he was even alive.

Splinter kisses his head one last time and leaves the room. As soon as the door closes, Mikey rips his finger through the envelope, scrounging desperately for the folded paper inside. It was a bit dirty and had a few tear stained, but it _smelled_ like her. It made him think that she was still here with him, laughing at his side and kissing his cheek.

_My Daring Hero,_

_I know that very soon I am going to die._

_Of course, it is more fun to avoid reality in a wide spectrum of magic and imaginations and scenarios where adventures are the cure to cancer, but sadly that just isn’t the truth. The truth is that I am dying, whether I like it or not, and none of us can do absolutely anything about it._

_Guess the forces of evil won this time around, huh? I guess no hero wins all of the time, now do they? There’s only one way that you can defeat them, that you can avenge me-_

_You cannot let them take you._

_You, Michelangelo Hamato, are going to live your life. You are going to have the best adventures in the whole wide world and you are going to be happy, and you are not gonna let a damn thing pull you down. When I promised you I would always be with you, I meant it, just not in the way that you and I would prefer. I am always going to be with you because I am a piece of your heart, I am a part of your very spirit, and no matter how many years pass I will always be a part of you._

_Whenever you feel afraid, or sad, or lonely, remember that I am here to watch over you, to cheer you on as you get back at the forces of evil in the most astonishing way possible._

_I will never leave your side, and I will be up here, waiting for you. One day, there will be whole new adventures for us to accomplish in very new places, but not for a very long time. First, you have to do the rest of exploring the earth and once your mission is over you will find me again, waiting for you._

_I am in love with you, Michelangelo. As I felt the light drift out of my body and the earth slowly fade away from my reach I was still kept shining bright every time I looked into your eyes or saw you smile. One day, we will get married, but it will just be in another lifetime. You are my favorite wonderful thing and I hope that you will never leave me either._

_You’re just going to have to be brave and put on that smile that I love so much, because there’s no way that you can let them win. You’re going to prove them wrong – promise?_

_I love you._

_-Queen Renet_

Michelangelo folded back the paper and held it tightly to his chest, warm tears falling again but for the first time they were accompanied with a smile.

“I promise. And I love you too.”


End file.
